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Far freakin’ out – I won some major bucks
recently at one of my regular poker rooms. Major bucks
meaning more than my humble deposit of $50. But instead
of recycling it back into another series of late nights
of Texas Hold’em, I decided to cash out.
The most difficult aspect of playing online for real
money is the cyberness of it all. The cash doesn’t
really seem real since you can’t touch it; the
chips are not lying in front of you, they’re staring
at you from your computer screen. Little electrons and
image files telling you that x-amount is sitting in
whatever account. It’s so easy to lose this money
– if it doesn’t seem tangible, then who
gives a flying rat’s ass if it’s gone. Well
I do, and this is one of the reasons it’s so important
to cash-out your winnings from a cyber-poker room. And
once this is done, I feel it’s important to invest
this into my ‘world of poker’ at home. I
want my winnings to have meaning.
I thought about sprucing up my game room. And what
better way to do this but to hang a big-ass picture
of dogs playing poker smack dab in the middle of the
wall? Art.com has them. Just do a search on ‘poker’
on their site, and all the poker dogs come up. Some
people find dogs playing poker creepy, but someday they
will be worth something I’m sure – like
those velvet matador and Elvis posters. If dogs ain’t
your thing, they have a ‘Poker Hands’ poster
that looks rather smart. You can place this on the wall
directly in front of your wife (or girlfriend) while
she’s playing. My wife can never remember the
hierarchy of hands – and this drives me nuts when,
in the middle of a hand, I hear, “Are three kings
good?” This poster would be the cure for my frustrating
frustration.
Speaking of the wife, I thought about buying something
for m’lady online as well. She’s always
worrying about getting fat, so I thought the best thing
for her is a big ass box of chocolates. Were you aware
that Vegas Image.com has a wide assortment of chocolates
shaped like poker chips? They look like the Real McCoy
– and wouldn’t that be a trip – watching
someone munch down a poker chip or two? Not only do
they offer chocolate poker chips, but plenty of other
edible gambling paraphernalia – chocolate dice,
playing cards, party favors, even slot machines that
dispense candy for the kids. “Let the kids have
a pull!” Yee-haw!
One thing that I thought was attractive was the King
and Queen Playing Cards Snack Pack. That would look
really cool for a home chillin’ poker party. Something
aesthetic yet distracting – you want your poker
buddies to pay attention to the snacks, not your playing
strategy.
But I passed on the poker chip chocolates. If I gave
these to my wife, she’d probably figure out where
I got the money from and commence to kick my ass. She
can bench press her weight, y’know.
So what else can you spend your hardearned winnings
on? Well, I invested about $50 on an excellent set of
DVDs from Planet Easy.com. ‘Win Big Playing Poker’
features the Hendon Mob explaining how to do exactly
that – win big.
It’s a four DVD set – actually three instructional
DVDs and one additional DVD that shows them in action
playing against each other, and explaining their moves.
The DVDs cover just about every aspect everyone needs
to know – from beginner to expert.
The first DVD is the ‘Beginner’s Edition’,
in which the Hendon Mob explain Texas Hold ‘em.
They cover the hierarchy of hands to table action, player
types, reading your opponent, playing etiquette, and
tips for beginners. It ends with a very clear understanding
for the viewer on how to play the best game.
The second DVD covers advanced poker skills: reading
tells, types of tell, making yourself unreadable, betting
patterns, and manipulating your opponents and –
last but not least – tips for winning online.
One thing I never thought about – they mention
that you should watch for players who are playing more
than one table. When these players make a bet, they
usually have a hand because they are forced to play
straightforward poker.
The third DVD covers tournaments – both live
and online. One thing pointed out is that, on the internet,
tournaments are choc-a-bloc with beginners. So if you’re
a relatively sharp player, this is something to keep
in mind. And if you’re a lousy player, this is
something to keep in mind too – and buy the DVDs
while you’re at it.
Most of us have learned this game from friends and
from watching others play. But learning it from these
guys was like learning the game all over again. Every
player should have a copy of this at home.
The guys close their treatise with the simple motto:
“Respect everyone – but fear no one.”
This is a rule all players should commit to memory –
no matter how trashed it is. And it’s tips like
these that make this an investment worth every cent.
I’m glad I won and cashed out.
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