First Annual WCP Reader Mailbag
The great thing about writing columns is if you ever run out of ideas, for example like we did this month, you can always fall back on the old “Reader Mailbag” shtick as a crutch.
It’s a great concept, really. Like doubling down when you have eleven and the dealer is showing a fi ve, reader mailbags require little thought. With that in mind, here is our First Annual Reader Mailbag column.
Q: If it weren’t for poker and really hot women, what do the entities feel like they’d be doing in their life? – submitted by bheptin (Part I)
WCP: First off, you capitalize “Entities”, son. It’s a proper name ‘round here.
Truth is, Wicked Chops Poker takes up a pretty small portion of our day. We all run side businesses, from a PR fi rm to RawVegas.tv and mmafi x.com, so Wicked Chops Poker is only a fraction (albeit a highly enjoyable one) of the day.
FYI, that “part of the day” is usually spent on the toilet. As was that “part of the day” that this column was written. A little known secret – until now – is that the majority of our posts are written on the can each morning. Gotta love laptops and Wi-Fi. They go together better than chocolate and peanut butter.
Q: How many entities will it take to screw in a light bulb? – submitted by bheptin (Part II)
WCP: What did we just say about capitalizing “Entities”?
Anyway, the answer is three. One to do all the hard work, one to claim he’s actually doing the hard work when he’s not (this role shifts on a month-to-month basis), and the other one to sell ad revenue around it.
Q: Screw poker...what are the Entities’ favorite TV shows? Books? Movies? – submitted by aragland
WCP: There we go, nice capitalization.
We used to make everyone watch American Idol during the old Wicked Chops Weekly Wednesday Home Game back in the day. So that show has a sentimental place in our collective heart. But all in all, our tastes are pretty similar: Flight of the Conchords, Lost, Entourage, The Offi ce, etc. To your books question: People still read books? As far as movies, that could take up ten pages, so let’s just say that Lucky You and High Roller: The Stu Ungar Story are defi nitely NOT on the list.
Q: Come on, somebody has had to threaten you guys or beat you up. I guess this needs to be a question so I’ll say, right? – submitted by scallen (Part I)
WCP: We’ve had surprisingly few incidents of physical violence against us. And by “few” we mean “none” really. Once Joe Reitman approached us about some mean things written about him, but fortunately he approached the wrong Entity (as in, the Entity he approached wasn’t the one who wrote the bad stuff).
The one great thing about having multiple Entities though is it always allows us to pass the buck on another guy, which we do quite liberally. “Which one of you wrote [fi ll in the mean comment]?!” “Oh, that was [fi ll in the Entity not there at the time of questioning].” That’s why you’ll never see the three of us together at the same time. We even fl y on separate planes. But that’s mostly because we’re petrifi ed of geese hitting the engine. We need to root geese out from where they hide (i.e., airplane engines) like we (used to) hunt down terrorists in their caves.
1.16.09 = Never Forget It’s not too soon to be making that joke, right? They all survived so it’s cool, isn’t it?
Q: Who is the best looking girl you’ve ever seen at a poker table? – submitted by sc-allen (Part II)
WCP: You mean other than our current/fi rst wives? Seriously though, easiest question so far: Joanna Krupa. Titan Poker put her in the 2006 WSOP. She’s just other-worldly pretty. Look at that photo of her. Notice how Josh Arieh is trying not to look at her? It’s impossible, right? There were nine really disappointed dudes when that table broke, and about 4,000 really disappointed ones when she busted.
Q: Where is the best place in the world to both play poker and meet hot girls? – submitted by mofo
WCP: The Rio Amazon Room during the WSOP. Most people don’t realize: 1) how many attractive girls can be found playing poker during the WSOP (at least four or fi ve per tourney, which doesn’t sound like a lot, but that’s four or fi ve more than you’ll fi nd on a basketball court), and 2) how many hot girlfriends/wives/railbirds there are.
Q: Are you really that sexist? Please tell me it’s all a joke. – submitted by a woman
WCP: ........
Q: Do you ever cringe when you tell people, “Ya, I’m a poker blogger”? – submitted by dug
WCP: No
We never tell people we are “bloggers” though. We have a very healthy level of self-delusion. However, we have no idea what to call ourselves. We’re not poker journalists. We’re not gossip columnists. And despite what a few female emailers have suggested, we’re not “scum” or “pariahs” either. Guess we’ll just have to settle on Entities.
