Challenging lifestyle

I’m always fighting to find the balance between family and poker. I know lots of you struggle with the same challenges, whether you are the poker player or the long-suffering spouse or lover. This lifestyle is challenging. So I’m going to try to give you some advice.

1. Don’t take out your bad play or bad luck on your partner. Release that when you walk away from the table. If you can’t release it quickly, then let your partner know that you just need a little while to cool off, because if you start snapping, your partner will feel like she did something wrong. You get mad, she gets mad... it won’t help the situation.

2. Don’t lie about wins or losses. This person is your partner and should be treated as such. If you are lucky enough to have found someone to support your passions, realize that this is a partnership. If you’re playing on money you can’t afford to lose, then that puts stress on the relationship. You should sit down with your partner and develop a business plan. If you aren’t already a professional poker player, you need to discuss the pros and cons with your spouse. Don’t even consider going pro until you can pay all bills at least six months in advance.

3. If you make plans with your partner, don’t go play that day, because believe me, if you get stuck, or if a sucker walks in, you aren’t going to want to leave.

4. If you’re traveling the circuit, be courteous and answer your DAMN PHONE. It’s hard enough to have you out of town in the first place without having to wonder who you’re with or what you’re doing. Put your spouse at ease.

5. If you can remember a hand you played five years ago, then it shouldn’t be too much to ask for you to remember your partner’s birthday.

6. If you win the Main Event of the WSOP, you will be a rock star. Remember the people who loved you when you were just a struggling poker player. I promise, after all the hype dies down, you will be seeking out the friendships that were true.

1. If your future rock star walks through the door looking a little gray, don’t ask, “Did you win?” Just back off and give some space. I promise you, your loved one just needs to analyze what happened – replay a few hands in his mind. The last thing he wants to do is disappoint you.

2. Poker players aren’t going to change. There’s something unique about this game, and if you don’t understand that, the relationship probably isn’t going to work. Andy Bloch, for instance, has to have the most supportive girlfriend (soon to be wife) in poker. This gal is smart. She could be anything, but once she starting dating Andy, she realized that, with his travel schedule, if they were going to make it work, she had to get on board. So you know what she did? She started a website called Pokerwire. She travels everywhere Andy goes, reporting on chip counts and interviewing players. You should check it out at www.pokerwire. com.

3. If your poker pro doesn’t come home until 5am, you can take it to the bank that he was stuck in some game or a sucker walked in the door right as he was about to leave. Most poker players are honorable people. They might bluff an opponent at the table, but they don’t bluff in life. We are weird that way. So unless your guy has given you reason to believe he is up to no good, then give him the benefit of the doubt. I’d say he is just sick enough to really be at that poker table for 36 hours straight.

4.As players, we can never choose the day that a sucker turns up at the table, so sometimes we will need to play on Thanksgiving, Christmas, or your birthday. If we get that phone call that “Ramin’ Jamin’ John” is in town, there’s nothing that could stop us.

5. If you want to learn how to play the game, your partner may not be the best teacher. He will have less patience with you than anyone else. It can be difficult and frustrating to teach someone completely new to the game. Get some books on poker and start with that. Then play online at the lower limits to put into practice what you have learned.

6. After your rock star wins the big one... SPEND THE MONEY!

Hope ya’ll enjoyed this one. And remember, bad beats shouldn’t be pillow talk.