Announcement...Madsen Is Back!
Finally, I’ve gotten that elusive win that has plagued me for a while since my original WSOP run! I won the $1,500 buy-in event at the Commerce in Los Angeles and followed that up with a third-place fi nish in the $10,000 buy-in H.O.R.S.E. Championship a few days later. It feels great to fi nally get the results, but the truth is, I have had high expectations for myself and expected to be performing at a high level a lot earlier than 2009.
The problem with overall results is that they can sway your perception of your own game negatively at times and, of course, positively at times. I did so well when I fi rst entered the poker world that I felt inevitable pressure and restlessness when I didn’t go out and dominate in the months and years afterward. And although I still knew that I was as good — if not better — compared to my original run, there was a mental block that created a pattern of inconsistent performances.
I’ve learned that the key for any poker player is to try and put aside the idea of how they think they can play and how they should play, and to simply go out and play! It’s hard not to worry about what will happen and what could happen on any given day and in any tournament, but you can only play your best when you focus in on improving and playing consistently at your full potential.
The times when I faltered were when I worried about playing at my potential. Worrying about playing well can cause any player to overthink the game or to try to outplay far too often and make it tough to play solid at the times when all it takes is standard play to make the cut. Through the last half of the year I’ve gotten better at just letting go. Why in the world should I worry if I am playing well when I know that my game is strong? These mental blocks exist in all of us, and it is only on certain days when we can be completely free of them.
Even after my recent fi rstand third-place fi nishes, I can certainly see how my mindset was affected in the tournaments afterward — how easy it was to mentally slip up! First, in the 5k buy-in a couple days later, I became a living example of the fi rst mental “block” that plagued my game in past years: being too content! I was coming off a good week, so of course I felt so happy with my game that my play in the $5k tournament became less focused and more erratic. I made moves that weren’t necessary. I actually played very well in the beginning of the tournament, but as time went on it seemed almost like boredom kicked in and I felt the freedom to do goofy things... My chips went up and down inconsistently, and eventually I busted. This mirrors a lot of the tournaments I played after my big WSOP run. I wasn’t playing my best game because everything felt like a freeroll! Of course, I know now that isn’t how you become one of the poker greats.
A second mental block, and probably a more negative one, is what I noticed in my game during the LAPC Main Event. Still fresh off my preliminary win, I now harnessed a lot of confi dence and played extremely well for Day 1 and Day 2 of the event. Things just fell into place, and I didn’t worry much about the overall picture. I simply played each hand as well as I could, mixing in some plays here and there but not trying to push things too hard. Then came Day 3. I was decent in chips, but I didn’t have a huge stack. For some reason, I felt uncomfortable with my situation and worried about not making the money, being about 75 players away or so. Why was I now worrying so much? My state of mind was that I didn’t want the last couple days of good play to be wasted by playing bad on Day 3 and not cashing. The problem was, it was this exact fear that caused this negative thought to become a reality. I ended up playing below average and busted after two hours into the day. Arggggh!
Before, these mental blocks lasted for longer spans of time ... Now I realize how important it is to not let results affect my mind state. Although nobody can really play perfectly every day, the more I understand how my thoughts about my success or failure affect me the more I can learn to overcome them and play championship poker all the time.
So, I’m back! But where did I go? I always knew that I could win every day, so really, I never went anywhere. The problem was always me worrying too much about winning, or not worrying enough.
The fi nal fl aw I see in myself, which is probably greater and deeper than any other thing that could affect my game, is fear of success. My whole life I became used to being overlooked in a way, overshadowed. When success was thrown upon me all of a sudden, I didn’t know how to handle it. No 21-year-old would. I am still learning how to mature and come into my own as a great poker player and as a role model to some out there who might look up to me for advice or guidance. It is time for me to accept these responsibilities and start becoming the man I know I can be, both on the table and off.
Those who we look up to always seem to be invincible in a way, but I feel like it is my fi rst responsibility to show the world that everyone is fl awed. It is just about how you power through and deal with the adversity in yourself. I am coming to terms. My goal is Player of the Year. That is all. PEACE
